I'm sexually attracted to men. I can have emotional and romantic connections with them. I can, quite easily, pretend to be heterosexual.
Despite that, I chose to be a lesbian.
Now, I know that for most of those lgbtqqia-identifiers that they don't feel like there was choice in the matter; that they were born gay or lesbian. And, just like that, just how they were born with a specific orientation, I was born bisexual. I always remember being attracted to both genders. I never chose to begin liking men or begin liking women - it's just always been that way.
And, for those of us who chose to have a same sex partner, I think we're kind of the dirty gay secret. It's an inconvenient part of the narrative. We're supposed to concentrate on genetics, on pointing to all the animals who were gay, and all the gays through history. It doesn't sit well with gay advocacy groups to have members stand up and say "I'm a lesbian, I chose to be, and so what?" The idea is we need to prove it's not a choice, so we can be accepted.
Which means that our thinking is: If it was a choice, wouldn't we choose to be straight?
Our own narrative oppresses us. Why are we putting forth the idea that of course we wouldn't want to choose to be a lesbian? Why do we assume that everyone knows that it is bad and wrong to be gay?
It's okay to chose to be gay. It's okay to chose not to be gay. It's okay to chose to be a boy or a girl, or chose to identify as Italian or Namibian. And if there didn't seem to be a choice in these traits, that's okay, too.
For me, I decided to be a lesbian, and I love it.